512.
The situation was extremely critical.
I nervously scrolled through my phone, both excited and anxious.
Everything would be decided in this battle!

 

513.
Here was the situation.
Although this apartment wasn’t very big, it had three bedrooms. Yet Gu Yiliang suddenly suggested we share the same room—the master bedroom, the one with the ensuite bathroom. Just what was he thinking?
Even though there was nothing particularly strange about two grown men sleeping in the same bed,
Even though the pyjamas he had prepared for me were very conservative and proper,
Even though I had sneakily checked the other two bedrooms and found them completely empty—no beds at all,
I remained convinced he was trying to seduce me into losing my last “happy beans.”

 

514.
Right now, he was taking a shower in the bathroom, while thanks to his courtesy, I had already finished mine, used the toothbrush he had bought from a little shop, and was lying on the bed in my pyjamas.

 

515.
The sound of the water grew fainter and fainter, and every fifteen seconds or so I would glance down at my phone, then nervously turn my head toward the bathroom door.
I knew this scenario—I had seen it in fanfiction.
He would soon push open the bathroom door, wearing only a towel around his waist, rubbing his hair with a soft towel, unconsciously revealing his smooth muscles, droplets of water falling from his hair, sliding down his chest and abs, and disappearing into the towel… and that would completely melt away my last happy beans.

 

516.
I knew the scene by heart—but would I be able to resist?
Of course not.
What I needed to do was strike first, knock him out the moment he opened the bathroom door. I would seduce him until he lost all control, until he couldn’t restrain himself anymore.
I had seen the movie—this was how it worked. I would be even more ferocious than the roaring waves of Honghu Lake!
I would do it, I would win his happy beans!
I had to win this round!

 

517.
I frantically scrolled through my phone, flipping through articles like “How to Seduce a Straight Man,” “Secret Techniques to Seduce a Straight Man,” “How to Flirt with a Super-Straight Man,” and so on.
—Only to discover that none of it was usable.
What I needed was strong visual impact! Visual! Expressive! Overpowering!
Do you understand, Baidu, do you understand?!

 

518.
Hearing the sound of water in the bathroom gradually fade and then stop, my anxiety mounted as I got lost in the vastness of the internet. Then a few keywords flashed before my eyes: “the sexiest,” “the cutest,” “the most tempting,” “the fantasy-inducing,” “straight men can’t resist,” and so on.
I scrolled through the images and found some pictures that were actually pretty good. At least I liked them.
It was decided—you’re the one, Pikachu!

 

519.
For days now, Gu Yiliang had been driving me crazy with his constant flirting, but I had yet to see what his face looked like when he was the one seduced. Today, I absolutely had to see it!
I was so excited I rolled around on the bed, undid two buttons of my pajama top, spread my legs and knelt in a W-seated pose facing the bathroom door— (NT: thighs in front, calves folded back with knees apart and feet out, forming a “W” shape on the floor).
Hmm?
I lowered myself a little more… a little more.

 

520.
Why couldn’t I sit properly?!

 

521.
I looked at my phone again.
What did they mean by “men can’t do this position”?
What did they mean by “the structure of the male pelvis is different”?
What did they mean by “men generally can’t sit in a W-pose”?

 

522.
Back when I was seven years old in natural science class, I had believed that cutting a worm in two would make two worms. Was I really about to fall for this kind of crap again?
Just then, the bathroom door slowly creaked open. I braced myself, fixed my expression, and abruptly dropped into position—

 

523.
Gu Yiliang, who was drying his hair, froze mid-motion and looked at me in confusion.
I was twisted into a bizarre pose on the bed, sweat dripping in big drops from the pain, I couldn’t even feel my lower half anymore, and I stared back at him with a blank expression.

 

524.
Me: Oh.
Me: Is the ambulance here?
Me: Are you here?
Me: Help!
Me: This time it’s real.

 

525.
I hobbled out of the consultation room with difficulty, supported by Gu Yiliang, while Xiao Chen, who had been urgently summoned, looked at me in bewilderment.
As I staggered forward, Xiao Chen opened his mouth to speak—I shot him a glare.
He barely moved his lips—I glared at him again.
He stayed silent, then moved his lips once more—I blasted him with yet another round of death stares.
Finally, Gu Yiliang blocked my line of sight.
Xiao Chen: “I don’t understand why you two are even at the hospital. Do you really have no self-control? Let me see your medical record. Wait, why is this in orthopedics? Shouldn’t it be in…”
Before he could finish, I rushed to cover his mouth with my hand.

 

526.
The poor Xiao Chen, who had been hastily sent off with the medical record, vanished from sight.
I turned my head, heavy-hearted, and looked at Gu Yiliang: “See, it’s nothing serious, I told you we didn’t need to go to the hospital…”
Gu Yiliang looked like he wanted to laugh but didn’t dare to, under my piercing stare.
He gave a discreet cough and said seriously: “With the medical record, you can ask the production team to give you a few days off to rest in the hotel. I can bring you my computer so you can play games a little?”
But that would add to someone else’s workload, slow down filming, the team wouldn’t be able to progress, and my happy beans…
—Hmm?
A little character in my head narrowed its eyes.
I looked at him with a pitiful, helpless expression, clutching the hem of his clothes and murmured: “Then… will you stay with me?”

 

527.
Gu Yiliang tightened his grip on my arm a little and gave a low “Mm.”
—Hmm?
The little character in my head gave a faint smile.
I lowered my eyes and murmured: “But that would delay your filming, wouldn’t it?”
Gu Yiliang still didn’t let go of my arm, answering in a low voice: “As soon as I finish filming, I’ll come to be with you.”
—Hmm hmm?
The little character’s smile grew stranger and stranger.
I brushed my fingers against the fold of his clothes he had let me hold, and continued softly: “But it would delay your line practice, wouldn’t it?”
Gu Yiliang tightened his grip again, his voice slightly strained: “…No.”

 

528.
—Hmm hmm hmm?
So this was how Gu Yiliang reacted when he was teased?!
My happy beans were skyrocketing!
So this guy actually liked “green tea”! (NT: refers to someone who acts innocent, pure, or delicate in a teasing way.) Why didn’t he say so earlier?!

 

529.
I laughed inwardly in a wicked way, but outwardly I put on a gentle, caring look: “Then, when you come keep me company, you can still practice your lines. I’ll help you rehearse.”
Gu Yiliang suddenly looked like a heavy burden had been lifted, he loosened his arm and sighed in relief with a smile: “Ah, alright. As long as you’re not asking me to play games with you.”
Me: “…”

 

530.
Screw you and your whole family!

 

531.
I shook my head and started to leave, but a dull ache in my pelvis stopped me in my tracks.
Gu Yiliang took two steps to support me again, and, unable to hold back his laughter, said: “You still need to polish your acting skills—your emotion wasn’t convincing enough.”
Me: “…”

 

532.
Second injury! Referee! He hit me with a second injury!
No, actually it’s the third! He even mocked my acting skills!
I want to exchange back my Gu Yiliang Devil Fruit! I don’t want this manipulator!!!

 

533.
I fumed and raged inside, rolling my eyes all the way to Siberia.
He tugged a little at my face, amused: “I didn’t even ask why you were ridiculing yourself for no reason.”
I slapped his hand away and grumbled unhappily: “You said you had nothing better to do, and yet you wanted to test the physiological limits of the human body just out of boredom. Isn’t that acceptable?”
I shot him another furious glare.
He burst out laughing again, harder and harder, unable to stop.
I glared at him threateningly: “Stop it, enough already.”
He forcibly held back his laughter, rubbed his cheeks while still smiling, and said: “If you can’t even lift me, how exactly are you planning to test your limits?”

 

534.

It was going to haunt me for years!
A man must not be killed nor humiliated!
I clenched my teeth and swore solemnly: “Just wait, in a few days, once I’ve recovered—if I don’t lift you up, then I won’t call myself Wei anymore!”

“Oh?” He raised an eyebrow, smiling, ruffled my hair, and said in a soft, honeyed voice: “Yanyan, you really do want to take my surname, don’t you?”

 

534.
I couldn’t take it anymore.

 

535.
I was perfectly aware he was twisting the rules of propriety.
I knew he was referring to my father’s family name, not a husband’s.

 

536.
But why were my happy beans still flowing endlessly?! I didn’t even have that many left!
Why did it have to come to this, to such agony in my pelvis?!!!
We came from the same company—so why was there such a huge gap between us?!!!

 

537.
I growled furiously: “You!”
He answered with a smile: “Me?”
I gnashed my teeth: “If you keep this up…!”
He replied with feigned curiosity: “If I keep this up?”
Me: “I’ll just…!”
His smile widened: “You’ll just…?”
Me: “…I’ll go sing for other people!!!”

 

538.
He pouted slightly.

 

539.
…
Hmm?

 

 

Translator : DarNan