[ 31 ]

The emperor was not very happy today.

Although the empress has returned in triumph!

And he brought back two pastry chefs!

But at this moment, the emperor was not concerned about the pastry chefs.

The emperor didn’t even appear at the victory banquet, which was hosted by the prime minister.

Of course, the empress didn't either.

At the victory banquet, everyone understood: as long as there’s food and drink, it’s all good; a brief separation is sweeter than a new marriage, right?

In the palace, the emperor angrily stripped the empress bare and pointed, “You said you wouldn’t be injured! So what are these three doing here?”

The empress laughed, hugging him.

The emperor struggled, “Stop changing the topic!”

“I’m not changing the topic.” The empress said innocently, his hands starting to peel off his dragon robe, revealing his well-proportioned body, where the emperor noticed certain changes that should not be mentioned. “Chen missed your Majesty.” the empress said

“Mmm, mmm, mmm!” Perverse rogue!

“Si Si, Si Si,” the empress leaned in, his face close to the emperor’s, his delicate toes touching him, gazing at the emperor’s fair face which suddenly flushed, and he smiled, “Did you just steal a piece of the cloud cake (NT: airy dessert that resembles fluffy clouds, similar to a meringue) from the celebration banquet?” “!!!” The emperor stiffened immediately.

Weren’t you changing clothes at that moment?

How was Zhen discovered!

Xie Yun smiled meaningfully, “Si Si, let’s settle accounts tonight.”

 

[ 32 ]

The emperor was not very happy today.

Because the empress's method of keeping accounts is simply too!

Too!

Too!

Shameless!

Last night, the emperor ground his teeth, using the excuse of “A Yun’s return made Zhen too happy to resist” to finally get the empress to change “all day” to “night.”

However...

When the empress happily picked up that book, "The Eighteen Styles of Longyang," and said “night,” (NT: ye (夜), night) the naive emperor thought he was talking about one page! (NT: yè (页), page. Similar pronunciation, different writing and meaning)

(NT: The Eighteen Styles of Longyang" (龙阳十八式) refers to a classic text associated with homosexual love in Chinese culture. Long Yang was a favored male companion of the King of Wei during the Warring States period)

As a result, “night” indeed meant “night.”

One night = six pages.

The next day, the emperor still hadn’t managed to get up to review the memorials.

The emperor expressed that he would like to know how many “pages” the empress’s "day" had for the rest of his life.

(NT: In this context "天" (tiān), meaning "heaven" or "day," is an euphemism referring to intimate matters)

 

[ 33 ]

The emperor was not very happy today.

The pastry chefs brought back by the empress were exceptionally skilled, and the emperor was also very happy to finally be approved to eat two pieces.

However, before he could eat his fill, they went to soak in the hot springs!

The emperor using his toes to think (NT: ie. he doesn't even need to think to know what will happen since it's so obvious), could imagine how it would be like to soak in the hot springs with the empress.

— The emperor will eat hot spring eggs (NT: traditional Japanese dish), while the empress will eat the Emperor's hot spring cooked eggs. (NT: egg (蛋蛋) euphemism for testicles in Chinese slang)

So the emperor was causing a scene along the way! All the officials accompanying him could clearly understand why!

The emperor rode a horse while the empress rode in a carriage, drawing the curtains for privacy.

During mealtime, the empress sat at the same table as the general, while the emperor enjoyed his own meal.

When it was time for hot springs. The officials had their own pools, while the empress was gifted with the Phoenix Spring, and the emperor had his own Dragon Pool.

Everyone believed the empress would not behave himself in the Phoenix Spring! — This was a common thought.

Of course, the emperor thought so too!

The emperor grumbled in the Dragon Pool Palace.

He grumbled as he stripped off his clothes.

He grumbled as he cleaned himself thoroughly.

However…

The emperor was all wrinkled from soaking in the pool, but where was the empress?!

What? Had the empress went to Phoenix Spring and didn't come out since then?!

Clearly, he had that damn album hidden in his armsbefore we left !

??? Wasn’t he planning to look at it with Zhen???

The emperor instantly exploded with anger.

 

 

[ 34 ]

The emperor was not very happy today.

The emperor lay in bed, sobbing, and refused to talk to the empress.

— Why was it that he went to see the empress in the Phoenix Spring!

Why did he foolishly go in there!

Damn it, that was the hairband he used to tie his hair back!

What the hell was that bastard Xie Yun doing taking it!

Afterwards, this bastard had the audacity to say, “I didn’t plan to serve you tonight at all”?!

As if Zhen didn’t see you place that album right next to the hot spring!

The emperor sniffled.

He really, really wanted to throw a tantrum!

The empress laughed: “Are you angry?”

The emperor huffed and burrowed further into the covers.

The empress wrapped his arms around him from behind, warm and close against his neck, softly calling, “Si Si.”

“Hum!”

“Si Si, Si Si, don’t be angry.”

“Hmph.”

The emperor turned around, changing positions, and kicked at the empress playfully.

Forget it, after all, throwing a tantrum is too annoying, hum!

[ 35 ]

The emperor was not very happy today.

He woke up. His back and butt were sore.

Awakening, sore muscles.

And the culprit was not here!

Where did he go? The emperor kicked the blanket in frustration.

He ran away fter eating!

Does he not take Zhen seriously?!

The emperor was fuming, looking around.

He walked to the window and heard faint voices coming from the courtyard.

"The emperor will need a heir," said the general's voice.

"..."

"When that time comes, what will you do?"

"I'll abdicate and go back to guard the borders."

The general sighed: "Well, it doesn't matter. Since you've been scheming since you were young, there's nothing to lose. You only need to think clearly about why you accepted the jade pendant in the first place, and why you went to see the late emperor, willing to give up your military position to become the crown prince's consort? Could it be that you were like the Emperor and fell in love at first sight?"

The empress laughed: "I'll tell you on the day I abdicate."

The emperor hid behind the window frame, paused for a moment, then retreated step by step.

He recalled the day he gave the jade pendant to the empress. Back then, he was still the crown prince, and the empress was still a strikingly handsome general. He was so stunned that he foolishly presented the jade pendant and asked if he could be the crown prince's consort.

The general smiled, his eyebrows and eyes curving into a delightful smile. As he accepted the jade pendant, he gently cradled it in his hands and touched the tip of his nose, saying, "Yes."

However, the emperor's small face was fuming—because that scoundrel, that bastard, sneaked into the East Palace (NT: Palace where the crown princes usually leave) that night and took advantage of the young and naive fifteen-year-old, who was completely entranced by beauty, in all sorts of ways!!!

As for why the Empress took the initiative to ask the late Emperor to become the Crown Prince's consort?

Of course! Who could bear the blame after the crown prince being completely eaten?! Could Xie Yun take responsibility for it?!

Sure enough, he must really eliminate the Empress! Ah, ah, ah, ah!!!

— So, the Emperor was still not too happy today.

[ 36 ]

The Empress was very happy today.

Seeing the emperor’s wary yet proud demeanour as he tried to push him away made him feel amused inside, while on the surface, he seriously reflected on whether they really needed to have some distance these past few days—after all, they hadn’t abstained since their marriage. This little separation had lasted over three months, and it truly was a buildup of feelings.

This time, let’s take it slow and allow Ming Si to have a good rest. Last night, when he looked at his own wounds, his words were awkward and his eyes were red.

He never expected that Ming Si would actually come looking for him. He was out of breath from running a few steps, his cheeks flushed, wearing loose clothing, and his half-tied hair was only held back with a hairband—

It wasn't that Xie Yun couldn't hold himself back. ; he just didn’t want to.

Years ago, he had knelt before the Buddha and seriously asked, “I saw a very extraordinary person today. What should I do?”

At that time, the heart answered: being with him was a joyful matter, don’t ask whether it is fate or tribulation.

Xie Yun began to remember things at a young age. The first time he was taken to the palace to meet the then-prince, now the emperor—at that time, the prince was just a month old, wrapped in swaddling clothes, happily cooing while bubbles appeared on his face, and Xie Yun paid his respects to this cooing baby.

Xie Yun was born when mother was forty, which was considered quite old at that time. If a child like this were healthy and strong, he would be regarded as exceptionally fortunate. The emperor smiled and said to let this child often accompany the prince in play; if only the prince could grow up as robust as him.

After all, the Xie family was a family of military generals, and the title of Duke was hereditary and unchanging. The male members of the family had been practicing martial arts since childhood. Thus, when Xie Yun looked at that little dough-like figure, he simply couldn’t imagine that one day he would also become a strong and capable man.

On the way home, his father warmly told him: that is the Crown prince, the future emperor, and he is someone whom our Xie family has sworn to follow and protect for life. Do you understand?

Xie Yun nodded.

To guard for a lifetime.

So, the emperor didn’t know that for a very long time, Xie Yun had been closely watching him. From his parents, from his older brother, from his sister-in-law, from many words spoken, he could see a vivid image. Sometimes, while stationed at the border, he would vaguely recall that beautifully embroidered swaddling cloth, that little, adorable baby. Surely he had grown up?

I heard he was lively; is he as sturdy as I am?

That year, their chance encounter provided the answer. The prince accompanied the emperor on a military inspection, and he stood there, dressed as an ordinary soldier, only able to lift his head to glance.

...... The Crown Prince was a strikingly handsome young man with bright eyes that made it difficult to look away.

Xie Yun's thoughts grew foggy.

The person he was meant to protect for a lifetime suddenly appeared before him, radiating passion and pride. This individual shone brightly, adding color to the dull barracks. In that moment, Xie Yun realized why he had to dedicate his entire life to safeguarding this person.

Just because he was born for this—

If there was something, he would live for it.

After drinking some wine, Xie Yun slowly walked back to Phoenix Spring. Ming Si lay in bed, appearing to be fast asleep. However, Xie Yun was aware that he was actually eavesdropping on the conversation between him and his brother from behind the window.

He smiled and, taking advantage of the wine, approached Ming Si, holding back the urge to caress the cute sleeping face that he never got tired of looking at. However, he remembered he had been drinking—what if he lost control of his hands? His hands were all calloused, and if he wasn’t careful, he might leave marks on Ming Si’s delicate skin.

Xie Yun went to look for some ointment for his hands, but suddenly he heard Ming Si mumbling quietly, like a mosquito buzzing: “In two years, let’s look for some good seeds from the royal family; we can select a few to bring into the palace to raise and nurture.”

Xie Yun was stunned.

But he didn’t turn around, and after a moment, he smiled and said, “Chen understands, Your Majesty.”

Ming Si kicked the board and said, “Besides, removing the Empress is too troublesome. Besides, removing the Empress is too troublesome. The border is also very tough, so why are you smiling? And don’t forget to thank Zhen for my grace!”

“Yes, Chen thanks Your Majesty for your grace.”

“Hmph, that’s more like it! Tonight... you can't do it again tonight. Hmph!”

“Yes, Chen understands.”

“And you can’t force Zhen to read the memorials!”

“Understood, Your Majesty.”

“And also, I want to eat two more lotus rolls today!”

“… Eat one and we’ll do it for a day Your Majesty.”

“Xie Yun!!!”

Thus, the emperor was still quite unhappy today.

The end

 

Translator : DarNan