This was the second time Xiang Xi had seen Cheng Boyan completely naked—more thoroughly than the first time. This time even the half-pulled-up underwear was gone. He saw everything from top to bottom, and from the front, too.

His eyes widened instantly, unsure whether he should keep staring at Cheng Boyan or look somewhere else.

He stayed there, mouth half open, staring at Cheng Boyan’s naked front and the abs he normally couldn’t see—until he noticed a small bruise beside the abs, and only then snapped back.

That was probably from when he kneed him that day?

But thinking of that day made him recall instantly why Cheng Boyan had opened the door naked, and he got mad again. Who cared about the nudity, the front view, abs or no abs! None of it could upstage that “Big Long Legs” guy who wanted to video call Cheng Boyan in the middle of the night!

After a brief moment of shock at Cheng Boyan’s naked body, he pointed toward the living room and shouted: “That—whatever—Big Long Legs guy!”

“Big Long Legs?” Cheng Boyan paused, frowned, pulled a towel from the rack, wrapped it around his waist, and walked out of the bathroom.

“Don’t pretend to be dumb!” Xiang Xi followed behind him, his mind spinning chaotically. “He even left you comments on Weibo saying he misses you, and now he wants to video chat with you in the middle of the night! Video chat for what?! Pervert!”

Cheng Boyan normally dressed casually at home, but because he found everything unhygienic, Xiang Xi had never seen him shirtless. Today was the first time seeing his bare back—the dip at his lower waist formed by his muscles and the pretty curve of his spine made Xiang Xi blank out for a second.

“He’s…” Cheng Boyan glanced at the chat window on the computer and closed it. “A friend from a group.”

“What group?!” Xiang Xi frowned, his voice still loud. “On Weibo he acts like a horny wolf—licking this and that! Sees anyone and wants to fuck them! I say ‘fuck’ once and you slap me, he writes a whole page of ‘fuck’ and you don’t smack him?!”

“Does everyone get the same treatment as you?” Cheng Boyan laughed. “You even checked his Weibo? I’ve never looked. After we met in the group we barely talked.”

“What group?!” Xiang Xi’s head felt fuzzy, but he hadn’t forgotten the important part.

“A…” Cheng Boyan turned around and leaned on the desk. “Socializing group.”

“Socializing group?” Xiang Xi froze. A socializing group?

A socializing group!

His brain roared. He only went to internet cafés to play games—not to chat—but he had seen enough to know what “socializing groups” were! Many such groups called themselves social groups, but their real nickname was “hook-up groups.”

Mantou even poked at the keyboard with two fingers all the time flirting in those “socializing groups”!

And Cheng Boyan actually—

“Yeah. What about it.” Cheng Boyan stayed calm.

“You… I really didn’t see that coming!” Xiang Xi’s eyebrows were twisted like a bow knot. “You look like such a proper doctor! And you hook up with people! Even nude-chatting in the middle of the night!”

“I didn’t nude-chat…” Cheng Boyan sighed helplessly. “Are you done with your drunk tantrum?”

“Not done—still thriving!” Xiang Xi poked his chest twice. “No nude chat? But you still hooked up!”

Cheng Boyan looked down at his hand, stayed silent a moment, then raised his eyebrow. “And what if I did? I’m a single, older man. I have to deal with physical needs.”

“Fuck!” Xiang Xi’s hands trembled with anger. “With that Big Long Legs guy?! He’s always licking this and that—where’s your germaphobia now? Aren’t you the one who can’t stand a few smudges on a wall?”

“Then who should I look for?” Cheng Boyan narrowed his eyes. “You?”

Xiang Xi didn’t feel that drunk, but something in his head must’ve snapped. He took two steps back, stepped on the coffee table: “Fine!”

Cheng Boyan didn’t speak, only frowned.

“Didn’t you want to touch my legs?” Xiang Xi slapped his thigh. “What bullshit Long Legs—I’m the one with the fucking long legs, are you blind?!”

“Enough. Stop going crazy.” Cheng Boyan sighed.

“I’m not crazy. Isn’t that just how it is? I’ve seen your little videos.” Xiang Xi’s nose suddenly stung, without knowing why he felt wronged. “What’s so special about it?! Come on!”

“Xiang Xi,” Cheng Boyan looked at him. “Calm down first. We’ll talk later.”

“Talk about what? What’s there to talk about? Aren’t you holding back?! Older single male! I’m a younger single male—let’s solve it!”

Cheng Boyan didn’t reply. He stared at Xiang Xi for a long time, then slowly walked up to him, pinched his chin and lifted it, speaking very deliberately: “I’ll say it again. You rest a while. Then we talk.”

“No!” Xiang Xi’s eyes widened.

“Fine,” Cheng Boyan grabbed his arm and yanked him toward the desk. “You said it!”

Xiang Xi was thrown face-down on the desk. Before he could straighten up, Cheng Boyan was already holding his shoulders down, pressing against him from behind, pushing his shirt up, his hand sliding to Xiang Xi’s waist.

“Fuck!” Xiang Xi turned his face to the side; the cool skin of Cheng Boyan’s body pressed tightly against his back, making his whole body go rigid.

“Done?” Cheng Boyan removed his hand and asked quietly, “How much did you actually drink?”

A tingling numbness spread from behind Xiang Xi’s ear through his whole body, and the leg he was bracing himself with slid back a little.

“Do whatever you want!” Xiang Xi gritted his teeth. “Cut the fucking crap!”

Cheng Boyan paused, then suddenly lowered his head and kissed his ear, then his neck, then the hollow of his shoulder.

Xiang Xi’s breathing instantly turned heavy. He didn’t know if it was fear or anger—his body began trembling uncontrollably.

When the kisses reached the back of his neck, Cheng Boyan stopped, straightened up, and let go of him.

“What?” Xiang Xi stayed sprawled there. “Scared now?”

Cheng Boyan didn’t speak. He didn’t move either, just stood behind him.

“You hook up with people like this?” Xiang Xi said again.

Cheng Boyan turned and walked away—judging by the sound, he went into the bedroom. A moment later he came out again and slammed something down in front of Xiang Xi’s face.

Xiang Xi glanced at it. “What’s that?”

“Lube.” Cheng Boyan turned and walked into the kitchen.

“Oh?” Xiang Xi started laughing—he couldn’t even say what he was feeling, just laughed non stop. “Cheng Boyan, you sure have the whole kit.”

Cheng Boyan came back from the kitchen and dropped another item beside the lubricant—he set it down heavily.

Xiang Xi glanced again. It was a cucumber, still steaming with moisture. He stared, stunned: “What are you doing?”

“If you want to play, play by yourself.” Cheng Boyan bent down and spoke by his ear. “Xiang Xi, you’d better sober up. When I finish my shower, we talk. If you’re still like this when I come out, I promise I’ll give you exactly what you’re asking for.”

After saying that, Cheng Boyan went into the bathroom and slammed the door shut—loud enough to echo.

Xiang Xi stayed slumped over the desk, motionless, mind blank.

There was even a strange buzzing in his ears.

Cheng Boyan was angry.

He slammed the door.

Xiang Xi, what are you doing!

His hand jolted suddenly, followed by a wave of shame, tangled with regret and fear.

What was that!

He hadn’t even drunk that much!

Fine, getting drunk and acting crazy was one thing—but this kind of crazy?

Are you stupid?!

Fuck!

When Cheng Boyan came out of the bathroom, Xiang Xi was still sprawled on the desk exactly as before—hadn’t moved at all.

He walked over and pulled Xiang Xi’s pushed-up shirt back down properly.

Xiang Xi still didn’t move, staring at the cucumber.

“Sober now?” Cheng Boyan took the lubricant back to the bedroom, then took the cucumber to the kitchen, washed it for a long while, then came back out, sat on the sofa, and began chewing on the cucumber.

“I’m not drunk,” Xiang Xi said quietly.

“That Big Long… Legs guy—talked for a while before. Medical school student. Later he suggested meeting up, and I felt something was off, so I stopped talking to him.” Cheng Boyan chewed the cucumber as he spoke. “I joined that group just out of boredom. Never talked in it. Never hooked up with anyone.”

Xiang Xi didn’t speak.

“He hasn’t contacted me in a long time, and I never saw any Weibo comment from him,” Cheng Boyan continued chewing. “Check the Q chat history—the last time we talked was probably around New Year.”

“Stop talking,” Xiang Xi said, voice muffled.

Cheng Boyan didn’t continue. He silently finished the cucumber, then washed his hands and sat down beside the computer desk.

Their eyes met; Xiang Xi immediately felt embarrassed and tried to turn away, but Cheng Boyan held his head still. “What are you dodging?”

“Embarrassing,” Xiang Xi murmured.

“You caused such a huge fuss over this?” Cheng Boyan moved his chair forward, leaned down over the desk too, face-to-face with him.

“No.” Xiang Xi lowered his gaze. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I only drank… a little over half a jin. I don’t know why I got like this.”

“Half a jin is ‘only’?” Cheng Boyan said. “Why’d you drink that much?”

“I don’t know. I guess I was frustrated. Coworkers asked me to eat. I didn’t want to go, but I didn’t want to stay idle either.” Xiang Xi closed his eyes briefly. “I just felt like you weren’t talking to me anymore. It bothered me.”

“I wasn’t ignoring you,” Cheng Boyan sighed softly. “I was afraid of scaring you again.”

“No,” Xiang Xi said.

“Hm?” Cheng Boyan looked at him.

“You didn’t scare me,” Xiang Xi stared at the table—at this distance he felt like he was about to go cross-eyed. “Even if you did scare me, it’s fine. I’m not mad.”

“Not mad, huh.” Cheng Boyan brushed a finger against his nose, then leaned back in his chair. “‘Afraid’ is exactly what people say when they are mad.”

“What the hell is wrong with you.” Xiang Xi shot him a glance.

“I’m just afraid that because it’s me, you’ll think nothing matters.” Cheng Boyan said.

Xiang Xi opened his mouth but couldn’t speak.

That was exactly how it was.

“Xiang Xi,” Cheng Boyan rested one arm on the chair’s armrest, his fingers pressing against his temple, “there are some things I don’t want to say yet. It’s not the right time. Saying them too early would be irresponsible. That’s why I promised you I won’t act like that again.”

Xiang Xi looked at him.

“Didn’t understand?” Cheng Boyan smiled.

“I understood,” Xiang Xi said. He did—maybe not fully, but he vaguely grasped what Cheng Boyan meant, though part of him still didn’t quite believe it.

“Go take a shower,” Cheng Boyan said. “The whole room smells like alcohol.”

“It’s not that bad.” Xiang Xi sniffed his own arm.

“It is. I’m amazed I could even kiss you earlier,” Cheng Boyan stood up. “I’ll get you some clothes.”

“Mm.” Xiang Xi finally moved, straightening up from the desk.

Cheng Boyan brought him a new pair of underwear, then grabbed the pair of pants Xiang Xi usually wore here, and headed quickly to the bathroom.

There was still lingering steam inside, carrying that familiar lemon scent from Cheng Boyan—lemon disinfectant, lemon hand soap, lemon body wash, lemon toothpaste. If lemons were easier to grow at home, the pots of mint on his windowsill would probably all be replaced with lemons.

Xiang Xi took off his clothes and turned on the shower, lowering his head under the water. The temperature Cheng Boyan had set earlier was just right—warm enough, and the water sliding down his body felt soft.

Like… when Cheng Boyan kissed his neck…

Fuck!

He didn’t dare think further. He didn’t know what was happening; he was having a reaction that was honestly pretty embarrassing—and it only started after Cheng Boyan had already walked away and he’d calmed down a bit.

He’d been lying on that desk for quite a while before he could get up.

He didn’t know whether he was being too slow or too sensitive…

Xiang Xi scooped water over his face and shook his head.

He’d only shaken it twice when he saw the bathroom door quietly open. He jumped, instinctively grabbing a towel to cover himself.

When he looked again, he saw no one outside the door. Maybe he hadn’t closed it properly when entering? He reached out to shut it—only to discover the lock had come off its base and was hanging crookedly.

“The door’s broken!” Xiang Xi called.

“I know,” Cheng Boyan answered from the living room.

“When did it break?” Xiang Xi pushed the door closed; it immediately swung back open. Close—open. Close—open.

“When I slammed it just now,” Cheng Boyan said.

“Oh…” Xiang Xi remembered the loud crash from earlier when Cheng Boyan entered the bathroom. He felt a little embarrassed. “Then what do I do?”

“Just shower,” Cheng Boyan chuckled. “I’m not coming over.”

Honestly, even if he did, whatever—he’d already seen everything during surgery. Xiang Xi wasn’t afraid of that; it was just that showering with the door open made him feel unsafe.

But since the door broke because he’d been acting like a lunatic, he couldn’t complain. He just kept washing, pausing every so often to push the door closed again, then washing more, then pushing it again.

Showering felt like doing ten sets of physical exercises.

When he came out of the bathroom, Cheng Boyan was sitting on the sofa reading, idly spinning a pen.

“The door… I can go buy a new lock,” Xiang Xi said.

“No need, I can reinstall it,” Cheng Boyan looked over at him, his gaze landing on Xiang Xi’s leg. “That scar still isn’t fully healed. Drink less from now on.”

“Okay.” Xiang Xi hesitated. “I… used your towel just now.”

“Go ahead,” Cheng Boyan glanced at him. “I have plenty of towels.”

“I…” Xiang Xi stood there awkwardly, then lowered his head and walked toward the computer desk. “I’m using the computer.”

“How did your computer break?” Cheng Boyan put down his book.

“I don’t know. I slapped it twice, and my inner strength must’ve damaged it,” Xiang Xi sat down and plugged in his camera cable. “I took it to the repair shop; they said the hard drive burned out…”

“Then replace the hard drive,” Cheng Boyan said.

“No. Another five hundred. Might as well buy a new computer,” Xiang Xi clicked his tongue.

“Do you want this one?” Cheng Boyan smiled. “Definitely better than buying someone else’s.”

“…Then I’ll have to buy it on credit,” Xiang Xi sighed.

“Put it on tab then,” Cheng Boyan picked up the remote and switched to a random channel. “When you owe many debts, they don’t weigh you down.”

“I’m saving money right now,” Xiang Xi tapped the desk. “Forgot to tell you—I’m not living there anymore. Song asked me to do night shifts at the supermarket, so I’m staying at the supermarket now.”

“That’s good,” Cheng Boyan looked at him. “You should’ve moved out of that dark, gloomy place long ago.”

“Yeah, no rent or utilities, and they even raised my salary. This month I’ll actually have quite a bit left over,” just thinking about it made Xiang Xi cheerful. “I should buy a wallet.”

“I’ll give you one,” Cheng Boyan smiled. “Consider it a celebration.”

“I…” Xiang Xi laughed twice, then remembered the wallet he once found in Cheng Boyan’s coat. “Ah.”

“What kind do you like? The folded ones or the long kind?” Cheng Boyan asked.

“The folded ones are easy to carry,” Xiang Xi thought. “No, wait, the long ones hold more money, right?”

“How much money are you trying to carry?” Cheng Boyan laughed. “If you have too much, put it in the bank.”

Xiang Xi chuckled twice and stared at the screen without speaking.

That’s when Cheng Boyan remembered he didn’t have an ID. He sighed. “That Uncle Ping… why didn’t he think of getting you household registration?”

“You kidding? The fact that he raised me at all is already saint-level kindness. Household registration…” Xiang Xi laughed, then leaned back in his chair, looking up. “He always said—‘come quietly, live quietly, die quietly, that’s enough; don’t make trouble for me.’”

“You kidding,” Cheng Boyan echoed, “with that voice of yours, quietly? One shout and every voice-activated light in the building turns on—and the ones that don’t must’ve shattered.”

Xiang Xi burst out laughing, head tilted back for a long time. “My voice is that loud?”

“Yeah. Very. Every time you yell my liver trembles,” Cheng Boyan stood and walked to the computer desk, pulling open the bottom drawer. He took out a bank card. “Use this first. My mom used to put my allowance on it. The PIN is my birthday.”

“Is that… okay?” Xiang Xi froze. In his eyes, anything connected to identity was high-level stuff, so whenever someone asked him for ID, he’d stuff it into a mailbox and mail it back.

“You’re just depositing money,” Cheng Boyan said. “This card even has online banking. You can buy stuff online too.”

“I don’t know how to use that,” Xiang Xi hesitated, then took the card. “If I use your card to deposit money… will the bank people arrest me?”

“Why would they arrest you?” Cheng Boyan laughed. “At most, I’d withdraw the money.”

“That’s fine then,” Xiang Xi smiled and put the card into his pocket. “If you take it, that’s fine.”

Xiang Xi saved the photos onto Cheng Boyan’s computer, and saved the pictures he took for Yu Baoquan and the others onto a separate USB drive.

“When are you taking the computer?” Cheng Boyan asked.

“You’re really giving it to me on credit?” Xiang Xi hesitated. He really did want a working computer. He’d already learned how to look things up and such every day. But since Cheng Boyan obviously wanted to save him money by giving him his computer, Xiang Xi felt embarrassed taking advantage of him this openly.

“I still haven’t paid you for the photos you took,” Cheng Boyan said. “I can deduct it from that.”

“Oh please, paying me for taking photos was an excuse you made up,” Xiang Xi leaned on the desk. “I’m not stupid…”

“It’s not an excuse,” Cheng Boyan flicked his finger against the back of Xiang Xi’s head. “I just want you to do something—something you’re good at, something you’re interested in.”

“Can I actually do it?” Xiang Xi opened the folder, frowning at the photos he’d taken.

“You just have to do it. Don’t worry about whether you can succeed.” Cheng Boyan said.

Every time Xiang Xi left Cheng Boyan’s place, he felt lighter on his feet. Cheng Boyan’s words always made him feel at ease—like there was hope.

Even when he said nothing, just hearing that steady, unhurried voice made Xiang Xi feel grounded.

In the end, he didn’t take the computer. When Cheng Boyan walked him back to the supermarket, he asked again, but Xiang Xi still refused.

It wasn’t just about money—he didn’t want Cheng Boyan to feel like he was always waiting for him to reach out a hand.

He didn’t want to be pulled along by Cheng Boyan; he wanted to walk with him. Run with him, even.

Back at the supermarket, the night-shift coworker was just getting off. After helping close up, Xiang Xi checked the place again before returning to his little room.

He first took out Cheng Boyan’s bank card and stared at it for a long time, then pulled out his own money—his entire fortune was right here, a rolled-up stack.

He spread each bill out, counted them one by one, then straightened them neatly. He put the hundred-yuan bills into a small supermarket zip bag, planning to deposit them tomorrow.

He’d never been to a bank before—not to deposit money. Just thinking about it made him weirdly excited.

He grinned at the zip bag for a while.

After laughing enough, he lay down to sleep—then saw the clothes he was wearing and remembered he left his dirty clothes at Cheng Boyan’s.

…Would he throw them out?

Or wash them?

They must smell like alcohol. And sweat. If Cheng Boyan picked them up, wouldn’t he go crazy…

No! That wasn’t the main point!

Xiang Xi suddenly sat up. The main point was that ball of clothes also had his underwear in it!

“Ah!” Xiang Xi’s face reddened instantly.

Then he thought about it and exhaled with relief. Even though he’d been drinking, thankfully all that shock, embarrassment, and anger earlier kept him from fully reacting. If he had reacted and couldn’t hide it, he would probably have rolled all the way to Cheng Boyan’s place.

But just when the embarrassment faded, the feeling of Cheng Boyan pressing down on him suddenly surged back—an electric shock of tingling warmth shooting through him and knocking him flat on the bed.

“Ah—” Xiang Xi grabbed his pillow and yelled into it, then tugged at his pants. “Go to hell—enough already…”

 

 

Translator : DarNan