776.
The lights, the stage setup, the camera positions, the props—everything was ready for the recording. The audience, who had already entered early, had also been properly guided and seated by the production crew.
At the front of the stage, an animated warm-up performance was underway. Gu Yiliang and I were hidden behind a huge set panel, waiting for our entrance, gesturing wildly and using improvised sign language to discuss what we’d eat after the show.

It was already 9 p.m., and since the live show was scheduled for an hour and a half, it would have to end before 11 p.m. Even if the director or hosts improvised a bit and stretched the time, the latest possible wrap-up would still be before midnight. After packing up, we could slip into a small late-night shop and have a steaming pot of congee.

777.
It wasn’t that I had nerves of steel or that I felt zero pressure about the show. It was mostly because one of the other CP groups invited had an actor with some real fame. Not only did he show up late with a laid-back attitude, without even offering an apology, but he also breezed through rehearsal carelessly and in a rush.
Since the show was supposed to revolve around him, if anything went wrong during the live broadcast, the fault would land squarely on him.

Besides, the script had already been checked and finalized, and I knew the flow. The segments were mostly simple, safe variety games that had already been tested in rehearsal. Even if Gu Yiliang slipped in some subtle flirting, it wouldn’t derail anything.
So I sat back, sipping my tea, while he and I both wore our professional smiles, calmly watching as the giant set panel slowly parted open.

 

778.
The lineup of the show’s “couples” was arranged like this:

One man-woman CP, the big-name stars with leading roles on screen, radiating a sweet romantic vibe.

One boy-boy CP, a fresh and lively duo of young actors, bursting with energy.

And finally, Gu Yiliang and me.

 

779.
In total, three CP “pairs” on stage—six people lined up. We each did our short introductions on camera with the two hosts, traded compliments, promoted our latest projects or recently finished dramas. After that, according to the script, we were split into three teams, then sat around the prop table to listen as the hosts explained the first game to the audience.

 

780.
The show’s overall rhythm alternated between verbal interaction, physical interaction, and back again to verbal interaction.
The first little game introduced by the hosts was a classic: Guess the Song Lyrics. One person reads a blurred or incomplete line from a song, and the other has to guess which song it’s from.

SO EASY!
Rock-solid. Nothing could go wrong.
I sipped my hot tea leisurely.

782.
BG CP man: “Walking, lifting your head, and counting the stars?”
BG CP woman: “Ah, I know! That’s Starry Sky, right? Holding hands, one step, two steps…”
BG CP man: “Yes, that’s it!”

BL CP guy 1: “It’s been a long, long time… uh, feelings changed… uh…”
BL CP guy 2: “What?!”
BL CP guy 1: “Ten years! That line from ten years ago! You idiot!”

Gu Yiliang: “Two things you’ll never do with me.”
Me: “…”
Me: “…A hint?”
Gu Yiliang: “Another sip of tea.”
Me: “… ‘You intoxicated me, you made me cry’?”
Gu Yiliang: “Correct.”
Me: “…”
Everyone else: “…”

BG CP man: “Walking, uh… feeling the wind, basking in the sun…”
BG CP woman: “Sweet, sweet? Walking in the wind, the sun suddenly feels so sweet today?”
BG CP man: “Yes, yes, very clever…”

BL CP guy 1: “The feelings! The wind! It blows strong! Very strong!”
BL CP guy 2: “What?!”
BL CP guy 1: “Love is like a gust of wind that soars! You idiot!”

Gu Yiliang: “Something that doesn’t exist, something I don’t want to see.”
Me: “…”
Everyone else: “…”
Me: “… ‘The tears of the North Star, your eyes red with tears’?”
Gu Yiliang: “Correct.”
Everyone else: “…”

 

783.
The hot tea scorched not just my mouth, but my chest—I was starting to panic.

 

784.
I frantically gestured at him: ‘Cut it out, tone it down!’
He shot back a questioning look: ‘I didn’t do anything!’
I blinked at him fiercely: ‘This is live, in front of everyone’

Once again, he gave me a bewildered look. ‘But I really didn’t do anything.’
The host’s voice carried a mix of teasing and suspicion. “Oh? I thought you two had secretly rehearsed this—but it turns out you’ve just been cheating with eye contact?”

Everyone in unison: “Oh…”
Me: “?!”

If it hadn’t been the host, he’d better not be adding trouble right now—my mental teacup is cracking!
I blinked and forced a nervous laugh: “Hahaha, it’s just a coincidence.”
Gu Yiliang smiled and put his arm around my shoulders: “Yes, that’s called chemistry.”
Me: “?! “

This isn’t what I’m seeing right now—it looks like we have zero chemistry!

 

785.
I tugged nervously at the hem of Gu Yiliang’s shirt, then suddenly froze.
No, there has to be something wrong with me—otherwise why would I think this level of business performance was too much? If I take a step back and look at it from the audience’s point of view, it’s nothing, right?
There are still several rounds to go, so let’s just keep a low profile, hide our weaknesses, and focus on making the lead stars shine, promote them properly. Once we’re off-camera, we can be as harmonious and sweet as we want.
With a deep breath, I reset my mindset and, inwardly, poured myself another cup of hot tea.

 

786.
However, while I was distracted pouring tea, the host had already wrapped up the intro to the next segment.
Basically, the show had prepared several little scenes that we had to draw lots for and then act out live, to “play ambiguous interactions” in a relaxed way while also showcasing our acting skills a little.
From what I knew, the scenes were standard tropes: rich family disputes, boss-and-naïve-girl romances, righteous-versus-evil in a historical setting, or youthful high-school love stories.
That didn’t worry me at all—no matter what I drew, my acting skills were, without exaggeration, terrible, which would only make the lead stars look even better!
Host: “Alright, alright, get ready to draw your scene cards! Time to test your acting chops—Yanyan, this is your chance to prove yourself in front of the audience!”
I grinned, rubbing my hands together in mock enthusiasm.

 

787.
You could say I was truly destined for the Lao Huang family—my luck always seemed charmed. Whenever I wanted to draw something specific, I never missed.
I secretly thought about whether I should pull “rich wife” Gu Yiliang, or “naïve youth” Gu Yiliang, or maybe…
I turned to him: “Which role do you want to play?”
Before I even finished, he raised his hand and drew a card.
Me: ?! What happened to our supposed chemistry?!

 

788.
Host: “Okay, let’s see… The big brother team drew ‘righteous versus evil,’ the little wolves got ‘family dispute,’ and Xiao Gu and Yanyan, you two…”
Host: “Wah, now this is interesting. Do you know what ‘CP’ means?”
Me: ?
A very bad feeling crept over me.
Gu Yiliang and I shook our heads simultaneously, wearing our most earnest, studious expressions, and said together, in unison: “We don’t know, what is it?”
The host turned to the audience to explain the concept of “CP,” then back to us.
Host: “On the internet, there’s a group…”
Me: ?
That bad feeling kept growing stronger. What do I do?
Host: “They’ve written quite a lot of creative works about your ‘CP’…”
Me: ?
Host: “Hahaha! And guess what—you two drew… fanfiction!”
Me: ………………………

 

789.
Director! Director, are you there?! Is it still too late to stop recording?!

 

790.
As if the heavens heard my desperate cry, the host raised a hand, adjusted a lock of hair, and subtly pressed on his earpiece.
I looked at him, full of hope.
He smiled softly at me, then turned back to everyone and said: “Just sticking to the script is a bit dull, so the production team added a little twist. While performing your scene, you’ll have to improvise a ‘funny,’ somewhat cliché romantic line to the other person…”
Me: “?!”

Where’s the fun in that?! Why does this program no longer feel like a proper primetime show at all?!

 

791.
The background music was soft and melancholic. The great hero glared with hatred, his eyes full of resentment, though a trace of doubt lingered there. His voice was low, heavy with pain: “You… do you really want to kill me?”
The great heroine’s expression was mischievous; her hand trembled slightly as her teeth clenched, the shining blade resting against his neck, shaking more and more: “Yes! Really!”
The hero gritted his teeth, saying “Good” three times: “Then… do it.”
The heroine moved the blade; her aura surged like lightning. The hero collapsed heavily to the ground, barely breathing: “… In the end, it was the wrong choice… Even now, I still want to say to Eye… … loaf… ewe…”

(NT: a garbled pronunciation of “I love you”)
The heroine froze, the sword clattering to the ground. She rushed toward him, crying:
“Why didn’t you say it earlier! Why!! ‘Eye loaf ewe!’ That’s what you meant, right?!!”
Me: ………………………

 

792.
The background music was majestic. The big wolfdog sat in the armchair, eyes lowered, leisurely adjusting his sleeves.
“Little brother, do you know why I asked you to come?”

The little wolfdog, his knuckles faintly white, tilted his head with an innocent, puzzled expression as he looked at him.

The big wolfdog tugged at his tie, gave a soft chuckle, and said calmly: “There’s no need to pretend. I already know what you’ve been secretly up to.”

The little wolfdog kept staring at him in confusion, slipping his hand into his pocket unnoticed:
“Brother, what are you talking about? I don’t understand.”

Suddenly, the big wolfdog shot to his feet, grabbing the little wolfdog by the collar: “Why did you take that land?!”

At last, the little wolfdog’s gaze began to waver, his breathing quickened: “W-what land…?”

The big wolfdog released him, brushed lightly against his collar, and gave a faint smile: “A piece of my heart.”

Me: ....................................................

 

793.
Director! Director, are you there?! Is it too late for me to refuse to record?!

 

794.
Finally, it was our turn.
The printed sheet of the fanfiction was placed into my hands—heavier than gold.

I held that paper as if it contained the fragile, butterfly-wing-light future of Gu Yiliang and me, something impossible to tear apart.

The host: “Don’t worry, the production team has already obtained the original author’s permission for this material...”

Ah, so you do have some awareness of copyright—good for you! Bravo!

I glanced down at the page—

Wait, it’s you again, WilLiam?!

 

795.
I stared at that old text, emotions surging.

Gu Yiliang slowly read through the words, smiled softly, and patted my shoulder: “Shall we begin?”

“Oh… oh.” I handed it back to the host, dazed.

Gu Yiliang gave me a strange look: “You didn’t even read it properly. Do you remember the plot?”

That was because I’d already read it so many times!! When I was out of things to read, I’d even gone back and reread this piece over and over!!

This passage was about the two of us, harbouring long-hidden feelings for each other, and then one day in the office corridor—our eyes meeting, a spark, electricity—love blooming at the corner of the hallway!!

I laughed nervously: “My memory’s good. Let’s do it.”

 

796.
The background music was Truth Is Real.

Gu Yiliang gently pulled me into his arms. He lowered his head, gazing into my eyes. His eyes were filled with such deep tenderness, it pierced right into my heart: “…You’re not hurt, are you?”

But we’re acting! Why are you so serious?! That gaze is way too enchanting!

I lifted my eyes to him, my cheeks instantly flushing crimson. I nodded, then realized, and quickly shook my head.

He gave a soft smile, pinched my nose: “Why are you always so clumsy?”

I suddenly realized—WilLiam had inserted this line here!!

I stammered: “S-sorry… Did I bump into you somewhere?”

With a gentle smile, he whispered: “What if I told you… I fell into your heart—would that be a little too sudden?”

WilLiam, what kind of lines are these?! I thought this was supposed to be the cheesy dialogue moment!

I blinked, unable to believe what I’d just heard, staring at him in shock: “…You… I…”

He held me tighter, eyes locking onto mine as if he’d read something there. He smiled, tightening his embrace as he pressed me closer: “You think the same, don’t you? You and me…”

Our hearts are connected, we live in the same world?! What kind of line is that?! We haven’t even gotten to the cheesy lines yet!!

I couldn’t help but clutch the hem of his shirt, my other hand resting against his waist, my eyelashes trembling slightly: “Yes, I… we… I want ‘us’ too…”

 

797.
The host raised his hand, pretending to shout through a megaphone: “Cheesy! Cheesy! Why don’t I feel the cheese?!”

Because you’ve lost your sense, haven’t you?! The clichés are practically overflowing from the screen, it’s insane!

 

798.
I was looking at Gu Yiliang, and he was looking at me.

We just stood there, unmoving, at the center of the stage, holding each other—neither of us intending to start spouting cheesy lines.

Honestly… it actually felt kind of nice to just stay like this.

No, the problem was—I truly couldn’t think of anything to say!

The host: “Hey, you two, aren’t you going to take this chance to hug a little longer under the pretext of swapping love lines?”

Me: ………………

 

799.
I clenched my teeth and said: “You… you know why I call you William?”

Gu Yiliang: “Hmm?”

I said slowly: “Because your name is Liam, so I… ‘will’ Liam. I will take you, I will want you, I will need you…”

Everyone: “…”

 

800.
The host: “Wait, wait, what? No, ‘will Liam’—there’s an extra ‘L’ in there? That doesn’t work, it’s invalid!”

 

801.
Host, were you hired by the production team specifically to sabotage the mood?!

I pressed my lips together and sneaked a glance at Gu Yiliang.

Gu Yiliang smiled gently, patted my head, still fully in character: “…The extra ‘L’—that’s our LOVE…”

 

802.
A master! A king! A top-tier player!
You’re the one carrying the whole cheesy script!

 

Translator : DarNan